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Permanent URL: https://mezzacotta.net/pomh/?comic=177
Strip by: Ian Boreham
title: Why the creatures of Greek mythology went extinct
{A group of centaurs are on a grassy plain. One is on its front knees, hands on the ground, eating grass. One is eating cooked meat off a skewer. One has the trots, literally.}
caption: Centaurs spent twelve hours a day eating grass, three hours eating human food, four hours experiencing digestive issues, and the rest of the time sleeping.
{Perseus is standing stiffly, holding Medusa by the "hair", sword ready.}
caption: Perseus had lost his contact lenses, so Medusa’s gaze only made him feel a bit stiff.
{The snake Ouroboros has swallowed his tail so far that it is now a thick donut shape.}
caption: Ouroboros was basically doomed from the start.
{The Chimaera is lying with its three heads on a pillow, and a thermometer in the lion head's mouth.}
caption: The chimaera had a range of maladies due to its incompatible body parts, and also found getting appropriate veterinary help difficult.
{The Amphisbaena, a two-headed snake, has such an enormous bulge in the middle that its heads are up in the air and it can't move.}
caption: The Amphisbaena swelled in the middle, for obvious reasons, until it was no longer able to hunt prey.
{One of the Hecatoncheires, fifty-headed and hundred-handed giants, is towering, but somewhat helplessly in front of a warrior with a spear.}
caption: Having fifty heads and a hundred hands did not make the Hecatoncheires the great fighters one might expect.
{The Lernean Hydra, with many of its heads cut off and then re-sprouted, is fighting a warrior, who is cutting of another head. On of the main necks, which has been decapitated many times, resulting in a crop of small heads on multiply bifurcated micronecks, is being attended to by a gardener with a scythe.}
caption: The Lernean Hydra grew back two heads for each one severed, but for circulation reasons, the new heads were smaller. The Hydra ended its days as a fractal lawn of miniature snake heads.
{A young man is regretfully looking at a bird cage sitting in the remains of a fire. The cage contains only ashes.}
caption: Inevitably, the owner of a phoenix will eventually wonder if setting fire to it will bring on a regeneration early.
man: Oops.
{Cerberus is lying on the ground, straining its necks back towards its tail.}
caption: Cerberus spent most of his time writhing on the ground with each head trying to sniff the butts of those other dogs.
The author writes:
Of course, there are plenty of other mythological creatures that would have been fun to include. I considered including both the sirens (bird women who would seduce sailors with their beautiful singing) and the Empousa (seductive female vampire demons with fiery hair, a leg of bronze and a donkey's foot, who would ensnare men with their beauty). I can imagine both of these types of ladies finding some of their attributes inconducive to seducing men.
After last week's comic, I wanted to do something quick and easy, to help start building up a buffer. So, I thought I'd do a quick and easy black-and-white strip. Unfortunately, this one grew rather, and I started having too much fun drawing it, and ended up taking way longer to finish it than usual!
Drawn in Krita and Inkscape.